According to Tinder’s 2023 Future of Dating report, over half of Gen Z users (ages 18 to 25) are integrating dating into their everyday lives. This trend, coined as Stack Dating or Errand Dating, involves slotting in dates alongside daily activities, whether it’s grabbing a coffee during work hours or meeting up after a workout (we still suggest a shower, if you want a second date with them). The concept is simple yet powerful – treat dating as a part of your routine, rather than an all-encompassing event.

The beauty of stack dating? It allows people to take control of their dating lives. By proactively scheduling short and easy-going dates, individuals can break free from the passive waiting game and have a more confident and authentic approach. This mindset shift encourages more meaningful connections, as frequent interactions help identify compatibility early on.

The pros of stack dating are clear – it encourages authenticity, prioritizes meaningful connections, and keeps the stakes low. It’s a no-pressure zone where you can show your true self. Think about it – meeting up in your work clothes or after a workout? That’s the real deal, not some fancy show. Plus, it’s a low-risk deal. You’re not going all-in, which means less disappointment if things don’t pan out. However, it’s important to consider potential downsides. Some may find the convenience of stack dating less appealing, as it might feel rushed or unromantic. Some say it takes away the magic, making dates feel rushed or unexciting. Plus, juggling multiple dates might mess with your head. And there’s the danger of coming across as not-so-interested, even if you really are.

While stack dating is a departure from traditional dating, that doesn’t mean that dates should be treated as mere errands. Show genuine interest, respect your date’s time, and be present during the interaction. Remember that authenticity is the basis of this approach, and being yourself is the most attractive quality you can offer. By choosing to show up as their true selves, Gen Z is sending a powerful message that they value meaningful connections, and they’re not willing to compromise their authenticity for the sake of fitting into conventional dating norms.

Being in a relationship can be very rewarding. It provides you with comfort and safety if you are with the right person. Especially in relationships, your partner becomes the sun your world revolves around. The honeymoon phase is exciting and rewarding, but knowing when to stop the honeymoon phase and settle into a mature relationship is very important. Because in the long term, if your happiness is dependent on your partner, it is a recipe for a disastrous, co-dependent relationship!

What is Codependency?

According to Brandy Porche, a licensed professional counselor, this term refers to when a person allows another person’s feelings or behavior to influence their own happiness. When we talk about codependency, it is not necessarily an entire relationship that we’re talking about. Instead, individuals in a relationship can be codependent on their loved one. These individuals’ entire personality is based on being needed. Porche elaborated that these people have a savior complex and lack objectivity due to it.

Signs of Codependency

When you’re in a toxic, co-dependent relationship, it can sometimes be hard to recognize as it can look a lot like love. One of the signs is constantly feeling that you have to compromise a lot just to stay with your partner, be it your values or integrity. It is also difficult to distinguish unhealthy codependency from a healthy interdependence which allows two individuals to mutually grow together while still maintaining their individual happiness. But if you feel like you’re trying to shift everything around just to please them, it is a strong sign of an unhealthy relationship.

How to Get Out

Author of Focused Positivity: The Path to Success and Peace of Mind, John F. Thelon, suggests treating codependency like you would any other addiction and deal with it accordingly. According to Thelon, the first sign is accepting that you have a problem and then proceeding to acknowledge that you might need the help of others to overcome this. Co-Dependents Anonymous (CoDA) is an organization with a 12-step design to help people get out of it. It also has a website through which you can find the meeting schedule. You can also seek the help of a licensed therapist. Once you unwrap the ball of co-dependency from around you, you can decide for yourself whether you’d like to continue the relationship or not.