Very few things in life are as exciting as finding your life partner. When you decide to formally declare your love for one another and start the rest of your lives together — aside from flower arrangements and guest lists — there are also other things you need to consider. For example, do you want to take your partner’s last name? If you don’t, that is perfectly okay. So, what can you do instead? Here are four awesome alternatives…

1. Use a Hyphen to Include Both Names

This is widely considered the middle ground for those who don’t want to give up their last name in favor of their partners. Since marriage is the union of two families, it would only make sense that you both join your last names to signify your union. It’s romantic, and most of those names will make you sound like a royal. Wouldn’t you like that?

2. Choose a New Last Name Altogether

Who said you should be the only person to change their last name? What if you both pick a new family name as they did in Father of the Bride Part II? It’s an amazing opportunity to start your joint life fresh with a name you chose yourself! It will make you feel special and unique. And if you don’t want to come up with an entirely new last name, you can combine both your current last names and see what comes out of that!

3. Ask Your Partner if They Don’t Want to Take Your Last Name

Traditions are often there so they can be broken. Before you start mourning the loss of your last name, try asking your partner how they feel about taking it themselves. It’s not unusual among younger generations, and it’s yet another romantic gesture that your partner can do for you.

4. Keep Your Last Name as a Middle Name

Here’s another “middle ground” option for when you want to take your partner’s last name, but you also don’t want to part with the history and meaning of yours. You can instead use your family name as your middle one and assume your partner’s last name to be yours as well.

Despite traditions, there is no actual rule about whether you should keep your family name or take the one of your significant other. Before you make any choices, you first need to ask yourself what it all means to you and how you want to present yourself to the world. Your partner will surely understand that.

Experiencing unrequited love is not at all an uncommon occurrence in life, so much so that this phenomenon has been a topic in every art form, from paintings and novels to music and movies. Sometimes causing just as much pain as a breakup, it’s a true form of heartbreak and not too far off from feelings of grief. When enveloped in such pain, there are things to do to overcome it.

What Is Unrequited Love

Simply put, this is love that isn’t being returned. It can happen if one falls for an unavailable person or one that doesn’t share the same emotional interest. Alternatively, this can happen in established relationships where one partner has become distant and the relationship became one-sided. The feeling that people experience from unrequited love is deep pain and can somewhat equate to feelings of grief, not unlike those that people go through during a breakup. However, with a bit of time, self-care, and determination, this can be overcome.

Avoiding Self-Blame and Being Objective

When experiencing unrequited love, many people tend to blame themselves. They begin to think that they’re not good enough or somehow unworthy of the other person’s love and attention. Although introspection is always healthy, unfounded self-blame can be quite harmful and lead to a loss of self-esteem. By looking at the situation objectively and understanding the other factors that led to the love being unrequited, it’s possible to get a clearer picture of the situation and not blame oneself. Take off the rose-tinted glasses, and see the other person for who they are rather than the idealized version of themselves our mind created.

Setting Boundaries

Longing for a person that doesn’t return the same feelings, much as remaining in a one-sided relationship, is a painful experience. Although it’s impossible to control or change other people, a change of perspective and setting clear boundaries is always an option. Writing down one’s vision of what a committed relationship should be, makes it easier to see what’s lacking in the existing one. If the boundaries aren’t met, it’s healthier to walk away.